My Journey......Mrs. Butterworth, 128 years of hard waffles

[CoderGuy]

lmao....which is the cool stuff? I post everything here.

It's all cool, I like the variety, jokes, videos, joke videos, all of it

[Frosted]

[lxskllr]

[lxskllr]

LX, I can't read your post dear
and no....that pic is not aimed at you.

Try right clicking, and picking "View Image" from the context menu. I cant really do much with the picture cause the forum is autosizing it down. You can also press and hold ctrl, then use the mousewheel to zoom in and out.

[Premium Parrots]

Buried in a Blue Suit

An old lady is very upset as her husband Albert had just passed away. She went to the undertakers to have one last look at her dearly departed husband. The instant she saw him she starts crying. One of the undertakers strides up to provide comfort in this sombre moment. Through her tears she explains that she is upset because her dearest Albert was wearing a black suit, and it was his dying wish to be buried in a blue suit. The undertaker apologises and explains that traditionally, they always put the bodies in a black suit but he'd see what he could arrange. The next day she returned to the undertakers to have one last moment with Albert before his funeral. When the undertaker pulls back the curtain, she manages to smile through her tears as Albert is resplendent in a smart blue suit. She says to the undertaker "Wonderful,wonderful, but where did you get that beautiful blue suit?". "Well, yesterday afternoon after you left, a man about your husband's size was brought in & he was wearing a blue suit. His wife explained that she was very upset as he had always wanted to be buried in a black suit," the undertaker replied. The wife smiled at the undertaker through her tears.... He continued, "After that, it was simply a matter of swapping the heads"

[lxskllr]

:^D

I love a nice ending to a story.

[Premium Parrots]

A woman's husband died. He had $20,000 to his name. After paying all of the funeral expenses, she told her closest friend that there was no money left.

The friend asked, "How can that be? You told me he had $20,000 a few days before he died. How could you be broke?"

The widow replied, "Well, the funeral cost me $6,500. And, of course, I had to make the obligatory donation to the church, pay the organist and all. That was $500, and I spent another $500 for the wake, the food and drinks, you know. The rest went for the memorial stone."

The friend asked, "$12,500 for the memorial stone? My God, how big was it?"

The widow replied, "Three carats."

[Premium Parrots]

Two buddies, Bob and Earl, were two of the biggest baseball fans in America. Their entire adult lives, Bob and Earl discussed baseball history in the winter, and they poured over every box score during the season. They went to sixty games a year. They even agreed that whoever died first would try to come back and tell the other if there was baseball in heaven.
One summer night, Bob passed away in his sleep after watching a Yankee victory earlier in the evening. He died happy.
A few nights later, his buddy, Earl, awoke to the sound of Bob's voice from beyond.
"Bob is that you?" Earl asked.
"Of course it me," Bob replied.
"This is unbelievable!" Earl exclaimed. "So tell me, is there baseball in heaven?"
"Well, I have some good news and some bad news for you. Which do you want to hear first?"
"Tell me the good news first."
"Well, the good news is that, yes, there is baseball in heaven, Earl."
"Oh, that is wonderful! So what could possibly be the bad news?"
"You're pitching tomorrow night."

[Premium Parrots]

[Frosted]

Paddy says to Mick "I found this pen, is it yours?"
Mick replies "Don't know, give it here"
He then tries it and says "Yes it is"
Paddy asks "How do you know?"
Mick replies "That's my handwriting"

[Frosted]

"Doctor, I had a dream I was ****ing a man. Does it make me gay?"
"Dreams can mean many things," my psychiatrist said. "You will have to be more specific."
"Well, we were in a hotel room with hideous looking green wallpaper..."
"Yes, it makes you gay," he quickly interrupted.

[Frosted]

[Premium Parrots]

[Premium Parrots]

[Premium Parrots]

Q. How many women does it take to wallpaper a room?
A. About two - if they're thinly sliced.