The Next generation of American Snus

[lxskllr]

Snuser:.....so how is your tobacco processed?

American tobacco: hey did you see the game last night?

:^D

Ain't that the truth.

[chadizzy1]

Snuser:.....so how is your tobacco processed?

American tobacco: hey did you see the game last night?

Snuser: what's the nicotine and moisture content of your snus?

American Tobacco: ooh look something shiny!

[truthwolf1]

I still sometimes think about that Camel "spice" flavor they use to have.

[GoVegan]

Snuser: Snus is great, I've really been digging this stuff

American tobacco: Try this. It's sweet, and you like sweet.

Snuser: I don't really like sweet that much. What else do you have?

American tobacco: Try this. We call it Busted. It tastes just like the snus you like.

Snuser: Seriously?! It tastes like lemon drops with a dollop of salt, and it's still sweet!

American tobacco: You like sweet. Here, try our new Mallow Mint. It has a great snus flavor.

Snuser: ...

Yes but don't forget that you are seeking a refreshing tobacco experience from a company you consider to be an authentic brand. Besides the cool tins make up for the crap that's inside.

[Ephemeris]

Actual conversation I had with an RJR rep:

Me: "So what exactly is the TSNA count in Camel snus?"

RJR Rep: "That's actually proprietary information? that we don't share with the public."

Me: "Why is that?"

RJR Rep: "That's... it's..."

Me: "Are you afraid that another snus manufacturer will copy your TSNAs for their own product?"

RJR Rep: "Exactly. And you know, it's just good business sense. I mean, you wouldn't want everyone knowing your social security number, you know? It's like a protective shield."

Me: "Right."

RJR Rep: "Exactly."


All of these exchanges and more to be featured in an upcoming issue of the Ephemeris. I guarantee you that the article will be seven pages of absolutely nothing of substance, culled from interviews I've suckered out of all the major US tobacco companies.

[SmokedEuro]

That's awesome. I Can totally see how TSNAs are just like social security numbers....LOL. I can see i f you were asking them about ingredient lists and such but considering that low TSNAs are a selling point of all suns in general they should be touting those numbers. Unless they are way higher than their swedish counterparts.....Then i can see why they are keeping that secret. Their still dicks though for giving you that line...at least think of a better excuse.

[Experimental Monkey]

We will never see a decent snus (in our eyes) from big American tobacco. I have just come to grips with it. America is full of pussies. The country has been neutered and these pussies enjoy candy with no nicotene. It's especially obvious when noobs come on here talking about how they like the garbage RJR and Altria peddles. America also has many other moral problems as well as the fact everyone (well.. most) will sell their souls for a fast car or a big screen TV or what have you. I mean come on, when Jersey F'N Shore is a pop culture phenomenon you know your country has problems. God I hate this place.

[SmokedEuro]

You are right we are assed out on ever having a quality american snus. Well that is unless one of us open a factory and make the shit ourselves.

[Darwin]

Jesu H. Christé can you imagine trying to start up a snus factory in this country? The paperwork would weigh more than the machinery and the up-armored goon squads of FDA assassins would make your life a very special sort of living hell. Likely you'd be a splattered bug on the windshield of the big tobacco boys and several notches on the belt of the Federal Department of Assholes. It would take a type of loving other-worldly true-grit philanthropy that would make Mother Theresa look like Kim Jong Il.

[chadizzy1]

We will never see a decent snus (in our eyes) from big American tobacco. I have just come to grips with it. America is full of pussies. The country has been neutered and these pussies enjoy candy with no nicotene. It's especially obvious when noobs come on here talking about how they like the garbage RJR and Altria peddles. America also has many other moral problems as well as the fact everyone (well.. most) will sell their souls for a fast car or a big screen TV or what have you. I mean come on, when Jersey F'N Shore is a pop culture phenomenon you know your country has problems. God I hate this place.

Quote of the year. /thread

[dreed2]

We will never see a decent snus (in our eyes) from big American tobacco. I have just come to grips with it. America is full of pussies. The country has been neutered and these pussies enjoy candy with no nicotene. It's especially obvious when noobs come on here talking about how they like the garbage RJR and Altria peddles. America also has many other moral problems as well as the fact everyone (well.. most) will sell their souls for a fast car or a big screen TV or what have you. I mean come on, when Jersey F'N Shore is a pop culture phenomenon you know your country has problems. God I hate this place.

Off topic, but a friend of mine's daughter (who was 22 years old) just died today because our health care system gave her a gastric bypass to make her thin. She wasn't all that fat to begin with and she had no health problems calling for anything so drastic. They gave her one surgery, then another to correct the mistakes they made the first time, then another to correct more mistakes, and today they were considering another surgery, but she died before they could cut her open again... Her mother said, "Please, tell me this is all a dream."

[Experimental Monkey]

Off topic, but a friend of mine's daughter (who was 22 years old) just died today because our health care system gave her a gastric bypass to make her thin. She wasn't all that fat to begin with and she had no health problems calling for anything so drastic. They gave her one surgery, then another to correct the mistakes they made the first time, then another to correct more mistakes, and today they were considering another surgery, but she died before they could cut her open again... Her mother said, "Please, tell me this is all a dream."

This is a great example of how the country has become plastic, fake, and materialistic. Since we're on the subject of snus around here, why shouldn't our tobacco match what we have all become? I really am sorry to hear about your friend's loss. I have two daughters and the last thing I want them thinking when they're older is that they have to be Barbie doll thin to fit in.

[lxskllr]

Off topic, but a friend of mine's daughter (who was 22 years old) just died today because our health care system gave her a gastric bypass to make her thin. She wasn't all that fat to begin with and she had no health problems calling for anything so drastic. They gave her one surgery, then another to correct the mistakes they made the first time, then another to correct more mistakes, and today they were considering another surgery, but she died before they could cut her open again... Her mother said, "Please, tell me this is all a dream."

My condolences. That's a bitch losing a child, especially that young. The circumstances surrounding it are just salt in the wound.

[Snusdog]

Man I am so sorry to hear of your friend's loss.

It would be easy to use this as an example of so many thing that are wrong with our society today. However, nothing can match the profundity and sorrow of losing the life of a person needlessly.

Unfortunately for the family..................... this is a dream...............a fiction of reality..................a parody of what should be.................. that we have contrived...............with tragic results

Our thoughts and prayers go with the family

[Ephemeris]

Our thoughts and prayers go with the family

Same here.

On a lighter note, I was in line at a gas station today and this guy in front of me was buying Camel Robust. He told the girl at the counter that he tried that "Swedish shit" and it didn't have any flavor or nicotine. I laughed and showed him my General Sterk can and told him that one of my portions equaled three of his portions in nicotine.

He said "I'll pass, bo. That shit tastes like dirt." I said that Camel tasted like Kool Aid to me. He walked away knowing that he was a lesser man than me.