http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/p...10/8631815.stm
In America we complain about only having two choices, and apparently in the UK they felt the same way, so they took all their crazies and broke them up into several differed parties, which include:
The New Millennium Bean Party's "beanyfesto" wants:
• Chewing gum to be collected from pavements and used to fill potholes in the road
• Children who leave home should not be allowed to return until they are 40
• Convicted drink drivers to have their cars painted bright orange for five years when they finish their ban and return to the wheel
• Public officials who are convicted of abuse of office to have their pictures printed on toilet roll packaging.
Citizens for Undead Rights and Equality Party, their "undeadly serious" campaign messages:
Its manifesto, published on the party's website, includes:
• Give the undead equal rights to the living
• Make cemeteries more comfortable for their inhabitants
• Implement a robust social integration programme for the undead, curing society of its prejudices
• Increase the minimum statutory retirement age to beyond death
• Permit marriages of the living and the undead
The Monster Raving Loony Party:
All socks to be sold in packs of 3 as a precaution against losing one
• Make it illegal for superheroes to use their powers for evil
• Ban all terrorists from having beards as they look scary
• Change the English symbol of three lions to 3 badgers
• School dinners must be regularly checked for radioactivity
• Add the Loch Ness Monster to the endangered species list
• Dedicated pogo stick lanes on routes to centres of work
Also they campaign on: "joining Europe in a big way" - by inviting the other European countries to join the pound sterling and then making the entire UK a European offshore tax haven.
He is also pledging a 99p coin to save on change
The Church of the Militant Elvis and Bus-Pass Elvis Party:
• Fancy a moat around your house to keep out randy footballers?
• Bono for Pope
• Turn public schools into pound shops
• Save public lavatories from extinction
• Fill in the potholes
• All shook-up about dog-muck everywhere? Bring back the dog licence.
The NOTA (None of the Above) Protest Vote:
Anyone baffled by this array of pledges might want to try a party that cheerfully admits it "hasn't got any", because it is a protest vote.
"By promising to deliver nothing, I'm the best man for the job I don't want."
In the unlikely event of him getting in, his one policy would be to force a by-election within six months - in which he would not stand.
Not quite radical enough?
Movement for Active Democracy (MAD) Party:
• would like to do away with the current system of government altogether.
He would still have MPs discussing things, he explains, but if a large enough group of, say, 500,000 people decided they wanted to stop a certain government proposal, the issue would have go to a referendum and could then be halted whether the government liked it or not.
"I have no manifesto," he says.
"I am not telling you what you're going to get, I'm asking you what you want."
In America we complain about only having two choices, and apparently in the UK they felt the same way, so they took all their crazies and broke them up into several differed parties, which include:
The New Millennium Bean Party's "beanyfesto" wants:
• Chewing gum to be collected from pavements and used to fill potholes in the road
• Children who leave home should not be allowed to return until they are 40
• Convicted drink drivers to have their cars painted bright orange for five years when they finish their ban and return to the wheel
• Public officials who are convicted of abuse of office to have their pictures printed on toilet roll packaging.
Citizens for Undead Rights and Equality Party, their "undeadly serious" campaign messages:
Its manifesto, published on the party's website, includes:
• Give the undead equal rights to the living
• Make cemeteries more comfortable for their inhabitants
• Implement a robust social integration programme for the undead, curing society of its prejudices
• Increase the minimum statutory retirement age to beyond death
• Permit marriages of the living and the undead
The Monster Raving Loony Party:
All socks to be sold in packs of 3 as a precaution against losing one
• Make it illegal for superheroes to use their powers for evil
• Ban all terrorists from having beards as they look scary
• Change the English symbol of three lions to 3 badgers
• School dinners must be regularly checked for radioactivity
• Add the Loch Ness Monster to the endangered species list
• Dedicated pogo stick lanes on routes to centres of work
Also they campaign on: "joining Europe in a big way" - by inviting the other European countries to join the pound sterling and then making the entire UK a European offshore tax haven.
He is also pledging a 99p coin to save on change
The Church of the Militant Elvis and Bus-Pass Elvis Party:
• Fancy a moat around your house to keep out randy footballers?
• Bono for Pope
• Turn public schools into pound shops
• Save public lavatories from extinction
• Fill in the potholes
• All shook-up about dog-muck everywhere? Bring back the dog licence.
The NOTA (None of the Above) Protest Vote:
Anyone baffled by this array of pledges might want to try a party that cheerfully admits it "hasn't got any", because it is a protest vote.
"By promising to deliver nothing, I'm the best man for the job I don't want."
In the unlikely event of him getting in, his one policy would be to force a by-election within six months - in which he would not stand.
Not quite radical enough?
Movement for Active Democracy (MAD) Party:
• would like to do away with the current system of government altogether.
He would still have MPs discussing things, he explains, but if a large enough group of, say, 500,000 people decided they wanted to stop a certain government proposal, the issue would have go to a referendum and could then be halted whether the government liked it or not.
"I have no manifesto," he says.
"I am not telling you what you're going to get, I'm asking you what you want."
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