Wtf am I doing?

[lxskllr]

Look at it this way, if you screw up and hate the military, you're only out 4 years of your life. Many people get stuck in jobs they hate much longer. It would be better to have 4 miserable years and know what it's about than go the rest of your life thinking "what if?".

[Snusophile]

This response is a little different than the others....

I don't see how going and putting your life in danger to fight in a misguided war will make you any happier.

War is hell. I don't see how coming back with PTSD is going to make you feel more fullfilled once you get home.

Life is 95% attitude. There are many people out there who would do anything to have the life you have. Maybe you could just try to see things a little differently.

If you feel a void inside you I doubt you can make it go away by changing your external environment... You have to find peace within yourself.

But that's just my honest opinion. I wish you the best...

You make a good point, however what if I told you I cant find peace within myself in this external environment? A man can find inner peace in a jungle, a desert, or a war zone. It's hard to explain why we do extreme things for pleasure or otherwise. I'm just trying to sort myself out and figure out if my feelings are genuine or just impulse..though I've never felt so strongly about something before, so I'm really not sure. That's why, as I said before, I'm giving it a year of thought.

[tom502]

I would recommend joining the Air Force or Navy. With a wife and all, I would not want to be sent in some ground battle. I was in the Navy. I was really going to join the French Foreign Legion, but changed my mind. But military life does not sit well with everyone. My Navy adventure wasn't all that good. Actually the basic training was my favorite part.

I cannot enlist in those branches because the age cutoff is 27, whereas the Army cutoff is 42.

Hmmm, that's telling, and not in a positive way.
Being over 30, and just joining, I think that would be a challenge in itself. I was 17 when I joined. I'm glad I did it. I was young and single back then too. I would not do it again now. But yeah, give it some serious thought and time. I was seriously going to join the french Foreign Legion, even had my passport, made the communications, and all, then decided not too. Not sure what I missed, but looking back, I think I made the right decision. I was a Hindu monk for a while, I'm glad I did that.

[sagedil]

I have read some studies done on older army recruits. And they are doing great and bring much needed perspective to everything. So far, the Army seems very pleased with the results

[Snusophile]

Just came across this news story, have a look:

http://www.csmonitor.com/2006/0906/p01s02-usmi.html

[Snusophile]

I would recommend joining the Air Force or Navy. With a wife and all, I would not want to be sent in some ground battle. I was in the Navy. I was really going to join the French Foreign Legion, but changed my mind. But military life does not sit well with everyone. My Navy adventure wasn't all that good. Actually the basic training was my favorite part.

I cannot enlist in those branches because the age cutoff is 27, whereas the Army cutoff is 42.

Hmmm, that's telling, and not in a positive way.
Being over 30, and just joining, I think that would be a challenge in itself. I was 17 when I joined. I'm glad I did it. I was young and single back then too. I would not do it again now. But yeah, give it some serious thought and time. I was seriously going to join the french Foreign Legion, even had my passport, made the communications, and all, then decided not too. Not sure what I missed, but looking back, I think I made the right decision. I was a Hindu monk for a while, I'm glad I did that.

It certainly is telling, and there's no question it has something to do with low recruitment and apathetic youth, but who could blame them? I'm physically fit, well educated, and I've been drilled, smoked, ran till I puked. I have been PT'd half to death and all that jazz. I may not be 18 anymore, but don't forget that many 18 year olds have wives of their own too. I know it's a big change for my wife, but she's known my feelings since the day I met her. If I chose to go enlisted I've got enough ROTC background to qualify for E-4 (Specialist), and my college degree puts me as a candidate for 2Lt. To be honest I'd be safer as an E-4 than a 2Lt. The 2nd Lieutenant leads his men into combat and back in Vietnam as a 2Lt. you were almost guaranteed a return trip in a pine box.

[tom502]

One thing to keep in mind too, is it's almost like a prison type environment, esp in basic training, and depending on where one is stationed. Some people are total jerks, bullies, and a bunch of young punks. I was 17 when I went in, I experienced all that. I'm glad I did it, way back then, but I could not imagine doing it now. I'm 42.

[MasterGuns]

I was in Marine Corps JROTC in High School and was a part of a commissioning program in college for a year and a half before I decided I needed to explore my other options before committing to anything. It seems like you've already done that and have a good idea of what you want to do. I commend that.
When I went to MEPS (oh you'll LOVE that) I was surprised to find that most of my fellow Officer Candidates for the Marine Corps were in their mid-twenties. One of them had been a banker for a few years, another had worked as an accountant. They had lives and good jobs and wives who loved them and they decided it was in their heart of hearts to join the fight. Everyone who joins makes significant sacrifices. For those men it meant leaving behind careers and loving wives and comfortable lives in the states. Such sacrifice is far more than many men and women are willing to make.
Oorah sir, boots up and Semper Fi.
As for me, I still don't know if I'm gonna leave the military behind completely. I simply don't know what I want to do. I've considered going back to the Corps, joining the Nashville PD, or joining the Coast Guard and flying or doing maritime police work with them. The bottom line for me is service. I want my work to change peoples lives in some positive way, and I think as a teacher you already have that in you. I trust you'll make the right decision for yourself and your wife.
Godspeed.

[tom502]

You will also have someone hollerin' in your face and calling you names and cussing you out, and making you do things that may be questionable. Also, if you don't support the nations military activities, you might wanna consider that too.

Now, I don't mean to sound all negative, but this is a big decision, and I know you are gonna take your time to decide, but hearing all sides is good.

Now, I also did have fun, but really my "fun" back then, at 17, was getting drunk as could be near every night, using illegal substances, an occasional prostitute. But amid the "fun", I personally did not fit well in the systematic structure, which actually got worse as I was there, and I suspect it's way worse now.

[MasterGuns]

yeah, one of the big things that wound up pushing me away was how the military, even over the past 6 years, has gotten worse and worse about keeping their fingers in your personal life. Now the Marine Corps has banned the use of Facebook on base PC's, I don't think it covers base housing, but no facebook on a work PC. Not too big a deal, but indicative of the way things are going.
Oh, and bases are becoming smoke-free completely, which to me sounds kind of insane. But it's part of those sacrifices I mentioned earlier. You will be government property in every sense of the term. If you're comfortable with that, then go for it. No reason not to.

[tom502]

Well, when I joined in 1984 at 17, in the Navy beards were allowed. I'm naturally heavy bearded, but while I was in basic, they changed the rule to no beards. And, when I joined, the men and women had their basic training separate, now it's not. And we had smoking lounge rooms, and even cig machines, I am sure that's all gone now. And when I joined, I was able to drink at the base club, then all of a sudden they changed it to 21. So here I was, a military member, yet I was not allowed to have a beer at the base club. It just got worse before my eyes. I'm glad I made it to get out with an honorable. But it really got extremely fanatical, and I know it's way worse now.

[Snusophile]

Thanks guys, I really appreciate the support and also critique that this thread has inspired. It's good to hear opinions from both sides to help form a decision.

[texasmade]

phile..i think you should if you want to join the military to fill a void i would choose the army or the corps i think you're making a good decision by doing so you can have ppl from both sides tell you to or not to do it but when it comes down to the final decision its up to you...do what you feel is right in your heart and follow it through 100%...

[hummer]

Just my 2 cents. . .

I think you are out of your mind.
To take a huge pay cut and leave a loving wife
is certainly no what she signed up for. Oh she
may agree with you and verbalize it. . .but get
real.
Take her on a trip to the local VA hospital and see
how lives have been changed. Are you prepared to
gamble and what is her feelings of this sacrifice?
We lost 50,000 men in Viet Nam and for what?
Now we are on our way in Iraq and for what?
War is not pretty.
If you were my student I tell you to grow up.
hummer

[Ainkor]

A man's got to do what a man's got to do.

You said you were taking a year to think about it and that's a good thing to do.

A few things to ask yourself:

Why are you unhappy?

Why is there a void in your life?

What do you REALLY hope to accomplish?

What does your wife REALLY think about this?

What will you miss while you are gone?

I am certainly not anti-military, hell, ever man in my family has served (myself included as a nasty guardsman for 3 years as a teenager) so I have an incredible amount of respect for anyone who puts on a uniform and does what they have to do. I was going to go into the Navy after I graduated from high school. My scores were high enough to look at getting into nuclear propulsion, which fascinated me but I got my soon to be wife pregnant and that changed everything for me.

That being said, if you feel that there is a hole in your life, fill it! Good teachers are as rare as a just war (har har har!) and it can be argued that by teaching you will make more of an impact on more people that you could ever do going out and blowing crap up.

The 30's are an odd time I have noticed. 30's are the new 40's when talking about mid-life crises. At 30 I was convinced that I should go to seminary school, get a degree and enlist in the Army as a Chaplain. It sounded good on paper and would be been exciting, but what I was looking for was an opportunity to make a difference. Long story short, I didn't go to seminary and I didn't enlist but you better believe I found ways to make a difference.

As a district manager for a small restaurant franchisee I have found countless ways to impact those around me in a positive way. Hell, two years ago one of my wife's employees was going to lose one of her kids if she couldn't get him from her mother after his summer trip there. She was supposed to bring him back but she basically told her daughter that unless she was there in 48 hours he was going to go social services and that was that. That was an unforgettable 23 hours. I drove her to Florida, picked up her son and drove them back. It gave her a reason to leave her abusive boyfriend and get her kids back into a loving environment with her family in another state.

I am not telling you that to brag, in fact the opposite. I seek out opportunities to help those around me and guess what? There isn't a void.

My suggestion? During this year, mentor some tough luck kids. Their parents probably hate them. Take some time tutoring struggling kids after school and see the lifelong change that the love of reading and writing can bring. Have afternoon study groups on how to fill out a job application. Be a big brother and your wife a big sister. That is an incredible organization that always needs people to help.

Sometimes we miss out on chances to do right here around us. I am not critiquing your situation and whatever you do is the best for you, but remember that there are always things we can do right in the towns where we live that will make just as large an impact as joining the service. Hell, if you are that hell bent on serving, run for local office. 99% of politicians suck!